On being spiritually accessible
As a perpetual seeker and someone who knows there is no end to the spiritual journey, even beyond this life, I have benefited the most from mentors and teachers who hold space for the unknown and create an environment of acceptance and unconditional love.
Accessibility is very important to me, and it means a lot of things. One of them is making sure my services can be easily accessed and are affordable to as many people as possible (i.e. offering virtual appointments and sliding scale prices). Another is not assuming everyone knows what the hell I’m talking about.
Sometimes, we might assume people get the “spiritual lingo” or have the same understanding that we do, like knowing what Reiki is, or how an astrology reading will work, or what we mean when we say we’re a witch. This is true in many areas of life, including the spiritual/magical community. It can be intimidating, confusing, or even off-putting to enter a new situation and feel like you already “should know.” Assuming that everyone has the same experiences, knowledge and beliefs doesn’t create a welcoming community. It ignores the vast diversity of spiritual experience that is, in reality, truer and more powerful than what we as humans are able to categorize or define.
I’ve had a very long journey with spirituality and religion in my thirty-six years, and I know it’s far from over. I was raised Catholic. I went to Catholic school and church for most of my young life, on Fridays and Sundays. I was baptized, made my first communion, sang in the choir and even served as an altar girl during mass. But I had a lot of questions. There was a boy in my grade who always asked the teachers “If God made everything, who made God?” He was shot down every time and told to just “have faith,” that even asking that question was sacrilegious. Secretly, I wanted to know the answer too, or at least be able to have the conversation. I longed for a more open, curious, understanding community to be able to explore the big questions about life and the afterlife. So, when it came time to make my confirmation as a teen, I told my mom I wasn’t ready to swear my allegiance to any particular faith. Thankfully, she supported my decision. I know I’m incredibly lucky to have had the option and encouragement to follow my own path.
I also had Jewish family and friends, so we celebrated Christian and Jewish holidays growing up. Still, I never felt a deep connection to a particular faith. I enjoyed many of the cultural aspects, but I found more sacredness out in nature or performing on stage. I began to develop my own sense of politics and values, and I found that they were often in conflict with the religion I grew up in. I found myself looking up to powerful women on TV and in movies rather than any kind of religious or spiritual figure. I still had so many questions, and I wanted to explore, but more than that, I wanted to fit in.
When I got to college, I thought for a while that I was an atheist. Some of the closest people to me were, and I wanted to be cool, so I said I was too. I shunned things like “signs” and “energy” because I was afraid of being seen as less intelligent, even though if I were being totally honest, I did believe in them. I also believed in ghosts, spirits, and some kind of force that links us all. But because I didn’t have words for it yet or a community that felt like it fit me, let alone enough self-confidence to stand up for my own beliefs, I decided I believed in nothing. Today, I know there’s a lot of variation in what atheists and agnostics actually believe, but at that time, it felt like a simple way to let others know I wasn’t going to be swayed by their attempts to get me to join their religious group. This coincided with me coming out as queer, and at that particular time and place, spirituality and religion felt like unsafe territory if I wanted to be able to explore my sexuality and live into my authentic self.
It wasn’t until my mid-twenties when I was in graduate school that I discovered Reiki and began to understand spirituality as a very personal, individual thing, that you didn’t have to subscribe to one particular faith or doctrine. I studied goddesses and witches as part of my Women, Gender and Sexuality Studies curriculum, and slowly, it helped me get back in touch with the things I’d always loved and was drawn to, but had buried under years of shame and trying to fit in. Since then, I’ve learned a lot from other religions too, like Unitarian Universalism, Buddhism, and others that take a more open-minded and accepting approach. I’ve even begun to reclaim some aspects of Christianity that feel meaningful and comforting to me (like Mary and the archangels), without the fear-mongering or judgement. As I get in touch with my own ancestors and spiritual guides and continue to develop my magical practices as a witch, I feel more and more aligned with what my true values and beliefs are.
I have learned that there’s no one way to be spiritual. It’s not my job to try to convince people of anything. Some things might be for you, and other things might not be for you. I’m happy to share my own beliefs and practices with anyone, regardless of what you know or where you are on your spiritual path. The curious, the skeptical, the not sure, are welcome. People of all religions and spiritual paths and no religion or spiritual path are also welcome. Healing is for everyone who chooses it. So long as you’re respectful and willing to be open-minded and receive love, I am more than willing to share.
As a perpetual seeker and someone who knows there is no end to the spiritual journey, even beyond this life, I have benefited the most from mentors and teachers who hold space for the unknown and create an environment of acceptance and unconditional love. It is my hope that I can be that kind of safe space for others to explore and chat about these things as well.
Have questions about Reiki, astrology, magic, or other spiritual stuff? Feel free to reach out to me anytime at lauren@heronkind.com. I’d love to connect with you!
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-Lauren